I am not known for being a patient person, quite the opposite, actually. I usually face this weakness comically- you know, joke about it so it does not seem so bad. However, this flaw has been becoming more and more painful to me as I ponder both when and with whom I am most impatient. I am impatient when I am feeling pressured, stressed, or even overly concerned for another and I am impatient with the ones who actually need the most patience from me. This pain recently turned into heartbreak as I recalled the following passage:

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.  Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.”

The first word to describe love is patient. Love is to be the hallmark of believers, what makes us stand out from the world.

John 13:34-35 “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”

The Bible states that the “fruit” of a person is an indicator of their spiritual health.

Matthew 7:17-20 “So, every healthy tree bears good fruit, but the diseased tree bears bad fruit. A healthy tree cannot bear bad fruit, nor can a diseased tree bear good fruit. Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire.  Thus you will recognize them by their fruits.”

When a believer is living righteously, being guided by the Word of God and empowered by the Holy Spirit, this is the fruit which is evident:

Galatians 5:22-23 “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,  gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.”

So, why then would a believer who is continuously in the Word and focused on a life lived for Christ fail so incredibly in this way so very often?

1 John 4:18 “There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.”

I have always considered fear a lack of faith in the Lord and His promises. While this most certainly is true, it is also a lack of love. If we are focused on loving others and the Lord, we are not afraid, we are too busy expressing that love. Loving the Lord and others more than self, then, is the key.

Philippians 2:1-4 “So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.”

When we do love others more than self, we are more concerned with their feelings and their well-being. So, even if we are tired, under pressure, or overly concerned, we will still express love and be patient with them.

So, now what? I look back and see how I have mistreated people that have needed love from me: friends, family, patients, co-workers. How do I fix this? How do I change? I suppose the answers are the same for any issue we face in this life.

Keep in the Word, daily, reading and meditating upon it.

Romans 12:2 “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” 

Pray to the Lord for the changes, the growth in Him, believing in His promises to transform us.

James 1:5-6 “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind.”

 Luke 17:5 “The apostles said to the Lord, ‘Increase our faith!’”

It is always painful when God holds the mirror up and reveals what is ugly in our lives. However, if we face the truth about our weaknesses and turn to Him, in faith, it will become part of the beautiful story of our sanctification. So, funnily enough, we must be patient as He grows us in love and patience.

1 Corinthians 16:14 “Let all that you do be done in love.”

P.S. Here is a Kids’ Corner I wrote on patience that you may enjoy- it is a quick read: http://byhiswell.org/view/?permalink=kids-corner---patience